Unconditional love is eagerly promised at weddings, but rarely practiced in real life. As a result, romantic hopes are often replaced with disappointment in the home. But it doesn’t have to stay that way.
The Love Dare, as featured in the popular new movie Fireproof (from the makers of Facing the Giants), is a 40-day challenge for husbands and wives to understand and practice unconditional love. Whether your marriage is hanging by a thread or healthy and strong, The Love Dare is a journey you need to take. It’s time to learn the keys to finding true intimacy and developing a dynamic marriage. Take the dare!
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296 of 309 found the following review helpful:
Be DaringDec 22, 2008
By Theresa As most people might already know, this book is based upon the Christian movie "Fireproof", which is about a man who saves his marriage by completing a character-testing, 40-day list of "dares" suggested to him by his father. Like the movie, the book of course is Christian based as well.
I loved the movie and the book is more of the same. However I looked at both of them from the perspective of a person happily married for over 15 years. I can tell you that while I don't practice all the dares in the book, my spouse and I are good about doing many of them- and of course there's always room for improvement. From my personal experience, I feel like concentrating on the kinds of ideas presented in the book have been absolutely key to making our marriage last.
Now the book itself also consists of a 40-day list of dares. For each day, there's about a page and a half or so of advice, followed by a specific dare and some space for you to write down your personal reflections. Dares range from things such as practicing patience to writing out a renewal of your vows. The guys will probably particularly like Day 32!
As you can tell, I highly recommend going to see the movie and reading the book. In a society that places a high value on looks and money, while sporting a 50% divorce rate, its nice to see more movies and books coming out that get people more focused on the right values in life. Even if you don't do anything more than just glance through the book, you're going to be given something to think about. Other self-help books I enjoyed include The Sixty-Second Motivator.
109 of 113 found the following review helpful:
Hope For Those Unequally YokedMar 18, 2009
By mk I became a Believer 5 years ago. Married for 6 years to a beautiful, amazing woman and blessed with 2 adorable children from this union, why do this 'challenge'? Why read this book?
I love my wife, and our marriage thrives. Sometimes I think if men would simply, truly love their wives, divorce would go out the window. In general, and forgive me for generalities, woman thrive at relationships and social activities if we give them a reason.
My dilemma: I became a Christian and my wife didn't. Still, our relationship works even with an essentially 'New Ager' married to a 'Jesus Freak'. I pray and witness to my family openly and try to do it with love and without a better than you, condemning, preachy attitude. But I'm flawed, and sometimes she'll roll her eyes or sigh, and either I or her get a bit defensive or worse, offensive. Whew!
The Kendricks' 40 day challenge offers daily encouragement essentially for Believers; although, anyone could benefit from a program that stresses kindness, attentiveness and re-discovery, but unless non-Christians are open and friendly towards the Faith, most will probably be put off by the Christian theme.
If you like a daily to-do format and the feeling of having a 40 day period of cleansing, starting over, renewal, I strongly recommend this for you. Most of the challenges are simply commonsense, but it's nice to hear it in short, digestable pieces and wonder what tomorrow's challenge will bring. And of course, it goes well with the movie.
I gave it 5 stars, not because it's a great, voluminous revelation, not that now I'm highly enlighted as my wife might say, and not just because I'm a Jesus freak, but because it calmed me down and help release my control; it urged me to look deeper, to want to give more freely without conditions, to try to love without too many expectations and to appreciate her for her. And as a man and a Christian, may I say: everything in the world is not about me!
"Yes, yes, I know all this." But, it sure helps to repeat it and be reminded of what's really important.
Finally, did it help my marriage? Yes! She didn't know what I was up to. And not to brag, because we struggle with life problems like anyone, and she's still a non-Believer(that's in God's hands) but our closeness and intimacy jumped to a fresh, new level. There's fireworks in more ways than I can say. Whatever you do, there's always hope, start anew.
117 of 125 found the following review helpful:
Giving love another chanceNov 18, 2008
By R. Lesniak
"Rob"
After 15 years of marriage and three children, this simple little book helped me to remember that marriage is not just about meeting the right person, it's also about being the right person. A small time commitment over 40 days breathed now life back into our marriage. I highly recommend it to all married couples.
105 of 116 found the following review helpful:
Sound Wisdom, But Not Without ShortcomingsMar 29, 2009
By James John Hollandsworth, M.D.
"lightalongthejourney.com"
Half of all marriages end in divorce. That means most marriage relationships are either severely dysfunctional or headed that way. What is the answer?
The Love Dare's answer is that we don't really understand how to live out the love that marriage requires. Inspired by the movie Fireproof, this book is a forty day devotional that covers various aspects of the true sacrificial love which is missing from many marriages.
There is a lot to like about this book. It clearly explains the nature of mature love & practically challenges you to live it out. It emphasizes how YOU have to be the one to take responsibility and change, regardless of how your partner does or does not respond, and it shows how the strength for that kind of love is powered by a relationship with God through Jesus Christ. This book has had a powerful impact on thousands of people, and I am very thankful for the truth it teaches.
However, the book does have some shortcomings. First, the book is unnaturally constrained to fit the plot of the movie. The movie's plot confronted the main character with his need for a personal relationship with God mid-way through, and so the book follows suit. Halfway through the forty days, we suddenly shift to a presentation of how living out sacrificial love should make one realize his absolute need for Christianity. For Christians reading a book on marriage, the discussion of how our relationship with Christ should structure our marital relationship should be foundational, should be page 1. On the other hand, a non-Christian reading the book frankly is unlikely to be impressed by this sudden foray into an altar call in the middle of the book.
Second, the book spends little time on the differing roles of the husband and wife in a marriage. From a Biblical standpoint, there are real & crucial differences in how a man loves & responds to his wife vs. how a woman loves & responds to her husband. The Love Dare doesn't address these differing roles which are very important to the success of any Christian marriage.
Third, I felt there was this unwritten "if you do these steps your marriage will be transformed" aura to the book. While all marriages can benefit from going through this devotional, I think that many seriously troubled marriages will not have the movie's storybook happy ending at the end of forty days. Consequently, I fear people will either conclude they failed in some way or that God failed in some way. Neither would be true. Many marriages need more than just a good devotional; they need intensive personal intervention by a person of wisdom such as a counselor or pastor plus two partners who are both committed and humble. In my experience true humility is seldom found in both halves of a troubled relationship.
The Love Dare is forty days of wisdom and challenge that will benefit any marriage; just don't consider it to be the complete cure-all for every troubled relationship in the world.
46 of 49 found the following review helpful:
Great Challenges for Growing Your MarriageOct 01, 2008
By J. Kennel
"marriagefanatic"
The Love Dare
This book goes along with the movie, Fireproof, which has a Christian marriage theme. The book contains 40 days of Biblical topics and dares for each day. There is a topic, and a reading for each day which includes scripture, a dare, a place to check off when you complete the dare, and some questions about each dare.
An example--one day is about unconditional love, and the questions for that day ask if this is different than you have acted in the past and how the current results are different.
There are lines to write answers in the book. For a couple to do this, you probably each want to get your own book. If you are the only one in your marriage who would buy or do this, you can still do it and get a lot out of it.
I highly recommend this. It is a terrific way to make baby steps toward a better marriage by doing very simple, measurable actions.
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